rē-ˈyün-yən

I'd have never gotten that phonetic spelling right on the SATs, let alone last weekend at my 25th High School Reunion.

Merriam-Webster says that reunion is the reuniting [Note to MW:  Don't define a word with the word.] of persons after separation.  Practical experience might lead one to add "every five years," but since there was no 5th; and I missed the 10th and 20th (was there a 15th??), this one was a whopper.

High School puts alot on a kid.  One minute you're an awkward goofball with a rebelling body that's doing things you can't understand and 25 years later you're a bald awkward goofball with a rebelling body that dosen't do the things it used to.  And the cliques that used to stake out their areas in the cafe--broken up by a quarter century, marriage(s), kids, 9/11, the iPod and hybrid cars--now stake out their areas in a half-banquet hall, having snapped back with remarkable resilience.

I observed things:

• "You haven't changed a BIT," is more likely to be taken as a compliment by a woman than a man.  Especially if you're a man walkign around with MY yearbook photo on your lapel. 
• "Boy, you sure have changed." is more likely to be taken as a compliment by the man than the woman. 
• When several people come up to you and a long lost friend and say, "Well, you two guys must certainly have kept in touch," it brings a pang of regret and the realization of an opportunity.
• Dexy's Midnight Runners? Men at Work? Ab-so-freaking-lutely!
• The nattering skinny kid that everyone used to avoid has grown into a nattering older guy that YOU still avoid, but geez, the girls sure are talking to him tonight...
• You CAN, with certain people, pick up where you left off.
• Never, EVER, cover up your name and say:  "Remember me!?!"
• The parents of teenage kids use the memories of exploits of yore not for kicks so much as for prevention.
• Rare are the non-alum spouses that enjoy themselves. 
• Where did the time go?

You remember.  You enjoy.  You laugh.  You marvel at the couple who made it from Senior year, through marriage, relocation to Florida, though cancer and who are dancing together with a joy that evokes the King and Queen of the prom and brings renewal of spirit and a twinge of shame for what you take for granted. 

At the end, you make the same promise that you made 25 years ago.  Only now, instead of saying it inside a yearbook cover, it's by Classmates or business card.  And if you're lucky, you come away with a few treasures that make it easier to read all the "I'm so glad we finally got to know each other senior year" inscriptions in your yearbook Sunday morning.  

Where did the time, go, Dan?  Let's meet those expectations this time.  That way I can I join the carpool!

Friday Night Videos (Literally)

If you're old enough, you'll remember.

Two literal gems from the folks at Dustfilms.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

After the ball

First:  This is not a political blog... but whatever your political stripe, if you don't have some sense of hope in you right now, you've just missed the fact that history happened on Election Night.  The candidate I voted for came in second place, but I wanted to wake up the kids at 11:30 to watch that speech Tuesday night.  They'll be able to tell their grandchildren about this day.

Now... Onto some even-handed yuks in the afermath of the election, showing that the nation should be able to find our political funny bone in our brave new "post partisan" world.

For the Democrats:  This is my favorite of Zina Saunders' work, which can be found here. 

And for the GOP this, from The Onion.  Where else??

Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are 

Today's Special Comment:  How long before Keith Olbermann starts to lose in the ratings to Rachel Maddow?  The poor boy has nothing more to be mad about now, and has neither Chris Matthews' unbridled entusiasm for politics nor Maddow's brains, good humor or "geek chic" dorky glasses.  

It's Election Day. You Know What to Do.

Now go do it.

And after you do it, treat yourself by watching the trailer of My Favorite Political Movie of All Time.  (I know , I know.  It's just a trailer.  But think of it this way:  It'll last about as long as that free tall coffee you can get from Fourbucks tomorrow.)

The Last Hurrah - The Trailer | Movies & TV | SPIKE.com

"I'm Frank Skeffington and I approve this message."

There's not much worse than stale toast

Working on a restyle... because there's nothing worse than stale toast.

For those of you following along on through the feeds, apologies for all the RSS noise. 

Harps and Angels

"When they lay you on the table, you'd better keep your business clean."

Tell me about it...

Click here for a listen, and a look at some videos  from an album that couldn't have come at a better time.  We've only been waiting here for well over a year!

8 Days Left Bye-ku

Always thought this song was beautiful, and a bit sad. It is.

Eight-oh-Eight AM

August 8th Two-thousand eight

Leezer turns the page

We may have survived Mary Tyler Moore signing off, but this is ridiculous! Now quick, go tell her thank you, and to come back soon.

Action hero for the 40-something set

I love the movies. Especially those made before, oh, the Ford administration.

Tell me you've never been so caught up in a film that on your way out of the theater you didn't slam your Astin Martin into first, roar onto the Autobahn with Ursula Andress at your side, evade the land mines placed by the Specter agents and expected to see Sean Connery's one raised eyebrow looking back at you in the rearview mirror as you slip away.

"Bond, James Bond."

"What was that, honey."

"Oh. Nothing."

Wake up! Your Astin Martin is a Ford Windstar, with automatic transmission. That's not the Autobahn, it's the mall service road. Land mines? Try traffic cones, moron. If you could see in the mirror thru the kids' smudged fingerprints you'd see your own glasses. And did it ever dawn on you, Double-0-Zero, why the Specter agents are all wearing day-glo vests and hard hats? It's the DOT paving crew, and SLOW the frik down before you get pinched or a double fine by speeding in a construction zone. You're scaring your wife. But you could earn a point or two if you tell her she's Ursula Andress!

Alas. By the time you get home, your Martini has turned back into a Poland Spring. The image has faded.

That's the problem with being 40-something in the age of the dashing and young. The policemen are almost all younger than you are. The baseball heroes, too. But FEAR NOT! From time to time, the ages produce the kind of icon that you can relate to. One whose persona you can wear after you've pried the last popcorn kernels from between your molars.

*His name is Ewell. Tom Ewell. *

He deals with the same demons I do.

He's just about as smooth!

And he's my favorite Summertime Action Hero.

Real stories that would be rejected at "The Onion," Vol. 2

And simultaneously give your local news editors and anchors "pun overload."
[Courtesty of the Huffington Post.]

"Nation Buys Porn with Stimulus Package"

President Bush's economic stimulus package, which appears so far to have been ineffective in stroking the economy to life, is giving an unexpected raise to the porn industry.

From an Adult Internet Market Research Company press release: An independent market-research firm, AIMRCo (Adult Internet Market Research Company), has discovered that many websites focused on adult or erotic material have experienced an upswing in sales in the recent weeks since checks have appeared in millions of Americans' mailboxes across the country.

According to Kirk Mishkin, Head Research Consultant for AIMRCo, "Many of the sites we surveyed have reported 20-30% growth in membership rates since mid-May when the checks were first sent out, and typically the summer is a slow period for this market."

Wait. There's a porn season??

Exclusive Wry Toast Contest:  Be Your Own Newscaster!

So let's say this little gem is the last feature on "Action-Witness News at 10," and you're one of the co-anchors. 

You cock (sorry) and eyebrow, look at Brick the Weather Guy, and say, 

"Guess you could say....." [Post a comment to win fabulous prizes!] 

The Sons of Liberty: Where are they now?

Tonight: A VH-1 and History Channel Exclusive.

As you nurse your July 4th "Beer really DOES mix with small explosives" hangovers, join VH-1 and The History Channel as they explore:

I LOVE THE (17)70's: What ever happened to the Founding Fathers?

George and Bennie hawk an American Revolution

Cranky Johnny and Pious Tommy Duke it Out

John "Read this" Hancock doesthe Palmer Method back home in Boston